Amoris Laetitia - On love in the FAMILY...

On love in the FAMILY/The Joy of LOVE


Amoris Laetitia is a post-synodal Apostolic Exhortation resulted out of the pastoral heart of the Holy Father Pope Francis. In this lengthy document he offers new pastoral methods and the ways on how to help and accompany families towards wholeness and well-being.  It is basically a catholic approach that deals about the contemporary issues of the families from a very realistic point of view. Well, this noble document was first signed by the Roman Pontiff on 19th March, 2016 on the feast of St Joseph the head of the holy family. It is a lengthy document divided into nine chapters, 325 paragraphs and has 270 pages. The document beautifully delves the theme on the joy of love from a triangle structure in a language that is lucid and simple; first it addresses the situation of the contemporary families in different contexts and backgrounds and then it sets scripture as an example where Jesus himself grew in a family setting; finally it speaks on the beauty of the family, the responsibility in bringing up the children and thus in concludes explaining family in the light of the scripture and tradition.

Holy Father in this document considered family as a mission and vocation in the life of the Church and the world at large. It is God who first willed and desired to make His Love real in the family setting. Therefore, family in its depth has a profound meaning and purpose, as God Himself wished to make family to grow in His love inclusively.[1] Hence it is not a document that consists of ideas, formulas and principles; but a copy that deals with people who live in a family setting and context. It is not a manual of problem solver, but a copy of deep reflections and insights coupled with wisdom of the scriptures and age old tradition of the saints and the Church (the family of the families). So, it reflects the mind of the Church as it brings God’s message of Love to the families of today especially to the families that are most in need of help, support and accompaniment.  

Well, as every road has two sides, similarly family in its dimension has negative and positive dimensions especially in the contemporary scenario where family at every moment faces threats of violence, poverty, money, media, ideologies and immorality-negativity in the world. All the same it is not proper for the pastors to judge and categorize the families and then condemn them for their state of life. So, Pope Francis invites us all to speak about family on a positive note, especially love in a family dimension by taking Scripture and tradition as the main sources. Thus he invites us all to work for the renewal of families despite biting difficulties, problems and serious issues. Therefore, Pope with this document that resulted out of two synods offers insights to the pastors, Church leaders and the religious to accompany the families, to offer discernment to the new couples and to support them at times of trail and temptation. So, it is an incentive for the pastors to form a pastoral heart to discern and guide the families with the heart of a prodigal father.    

Context: The situation and the context of the family in this globalized times is marred and shadowed by the evil forces of the times. As a consequence, family a social institution is shattered into pieces. As a consequence, abortion, broken families, orphans, semi-orphans, contraceptives, suicides, child abuses, violence against women are a daily headlines in the news papers and news channels[83 ].
These are challenges that families face day in and out in every nation; migration (Middle East), alcoholism, drugs, polygamy, pornography, prostitution and domestic terrorism in the families are few examples.       

Knowing this situation of the family, Holy Father invites the pastors to take initiative to stand by the families and make them know the values, morals and faith as they are the running streams of good family living. He sets Jesus who lived in a healthy family as the ideal figure for the Christian Families. Jesus says Mt 11:28 “Come to all ye burdened, for I will give your rest.” Thus, families collectively drive strength in Jesus as he lived in the light of the Word[2]. Jesus therefore, is a paradigm for the church. We know he began his public ministry with the miracle at the wedding feast of Cana (Jn 2: 1-11). He grew in a very homely and family atmosphere where we see him having a deep bond with the family of Lazarus and his sister; and with the family of Peter; he sympathized with grieving parents and restored their children to life. (Mk: 5:41, Lk: 7:14-15). With the example of Jesus who grew holistically in the context of the family invites us all to grow in a family in which love is the binding force of all the members of the family as in the holy trinity. St Paul tells how this binding force (love) is possible in a family setting in (1 Cor13: 4-7). 

‘Love begets love...’ ‘The fruit of hard work is to work more...’ Therefore, in family life there is continuity of love and thus the joy doubles in family as loves is shared welcoming the offspring. Every new born baby brings home a message that God still loves the world says Mother Theresa the saint of the poor of Kolkata. It is said, up above the heavens, below the skies family is the best; that is the reason why God chose to incarnate in a family where love is extended in fraternity, parenthood and relationship. Pope Francis going a step further invites the families even to extend this love of the family through adoption and accommodation. However, Pope Francis acknowledges that it is noble but not an easy task. Therefore, he invites the pastors of the Church to accompany and prepare the young people in faith and morals. By this young people are made aware of the Christian values, faith and morals. By this there will be less broken families, divorces, orphans and better family upbringing and responsibility since love is the key; for in love all things are made known and renewed in Christ Jesus.  

Family is the first school of learning where parents play the role of teachers. Hence, it is the duty of the parents to impart education and instill values in them. Today’s children are tomorrow leaders of the society. Therefore, importance is ought to be given to the upbringing of the children by educating and catechizing. Thus there is a mutual relationship that makes a family, a family. As the pastors accompany the young couples in matters of faith and morals so do the parents in upbringing of their children in love. This is what Pope Francis simply calls as the spirituality of Marriage and Faith [313-325] where togetherness is cherished, love is shared, responsibility is shouldered and above all love is build in a family.

Conclusion: Pope Francis thus makes an interesting intervention through this document addressing all the families; he describes family as a journey where everyone is invited to journey along not as nomads but as pilgrims. It is his personal appraisal for all his people, particularly the pastors to cultivate a pastoral heart to understand families and the individuals who live in their own contexts without pre-conditions and prejudices. We cannot pigeonhole people on the condition of our expectations [298, 305]. So, to avoid this pessimistic attitude we need to cultivate a good conscience; it is a paramount in moral decision making. At the stage legalism, pessimism and rationalism should be avoided. Instead compassion, understanding and support need to be offered. By this a pastor respects the freedom and dignity of the individuals to discern and make a good decision to live well in a family life. Of course accompaniment is a must in this process without any force and imposition of rules and norms. It is because the situations, contexts, traditions cultures and customs of one place are different from another. Therefore, as pastors and educators we need to be prudent and sensitive to the needs of the people. Thus we [pastors] respect all the members of the family. A pastor is exhorted to cultivate a merciful heart like God who loves us all despite our limitations and weaknesses. Such a pastor does not condemn the people, does not judge them; instead like the catalyst s/he invites all to experience the taste of God’s mercy, goodness and love.

Pastors are therefore, exhorted to go out and meet people where they are and not expecting people to come to their comfort castles and isolated cells. Only by going to the people a pastor can understand the complexities of people in their living situations. This act of a pastor propels him/her to extend one’s hands to help those sheep that need our care, support and love. So, when there is love there is no place for judgments, instead there is love that bears all things like Crucified Jesus who could forgive the people who were mocking, thieves on his right and left, Peter who denied him thrice, disciples who ran for life leaving him alone, Pilate who was self-righteous and those wicked elders who could not stomach Jesus as the son of God, Jesus who forgave the Samaritan, Jesus who gave sight to the Barthimaeus, Jesus the Good Shepherd, Jesus who wept, Jesus who sympathized with people, Jesus who had pity for people, Jesus on the cross, Jesus on the way to Emmaus, Jesus on the sea shore and Jesus who was ascending is our model, example and ideal for the pastoral work. Jesus is the forgiving of the Father. In Jesus we have forgiveness of our sins. Therefore, let us draw strength from Him to work for the kingdom that Jesus embarked amidst us. Only in Jesus we have our source of strength and hope. Jesus is the way, truth and the life. For he was at home with the smell of the sheep of his time and like the catalyst liberated the sinners, healed the sick, fed the hungry and raised the dead to life. He was ever connected to His Father who is rich in mercy and love.
 
This document Amoris Laetitia is an exhortation for the pastors, seminarians, leaders of the Church and the parents to grow in freedom and love of the father in a particular setting of a family where one is situated. It is a positive note of encouragement for all Christians to cultivate the Christian values and morals for a better living and giving for the good of all. 


(your comments and suggestions are encouraged...)

[1] All the members of a family in a holistic and integrated manner help and contribute for the good of a family.     
[2] As Jesus praised and worshiped God through Psalm 128 [58-88].  

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